Relic 01
Relics is an ongoing project, asking people to share items of personal significance - the things they have accumulated through their lives that remind them of a person, a place, a philosophy or a feeling. The things you take with you, that you could never willingly part with.
Cecilia Kegler
The transcript below has been edited. Listen to the full interview using the button above.
So my name is Cecilia Kegler. I'm a photographer and filmmaker, and I grew up in Orlando, Florida.
I moved to New York at the age of 18, to go to Parsons School of Design for Photography, where I did fashion photography - at first, I hated it - not for me.
Now, I do portraits of my family and my friends and people around.
I don't even know what to call this.
My relic is, like, What do you call this? Like a thing that you put on the end of a a fan or a ceiling? It's like a pull string, I guess you could call it. And it has angels on it and some kids.
“it just became something that had meaning to me and made me feel like home.”
So my mom used to hang in her bedroom and whenever I'd be sick or laying on her bed, talking to her, watching Hallmark movies or whatever, I would look up and just see it hanging from her ceiling.
It just became something that had meaning to me and made me feel like home.
When I moved to college to New York from Florida, I asked to take it with me.
And even though I don't have a ceiling fan and I haven't had anything to hang it on, I still keep it in my bedside table for one day when I do have a ceiling fan, and I can attach it.
I actually recently asked my mom if there is significance in it to her because for me, it was just something that tied me to her and her bedroom.
“it was like a guardian angel for my childhood.”
She actually told me - I didn't know this until now - that she actually bought it the day she found out she was pregnant with me, when she was upstate with my dad visiting his family. And it ended up going in my nursery, hanging over my crib. And it was like a guardian angel for my childhood.
Then it ended up being in my sister's room when they moved into the nursery, when they were born. Then it ended up in her bedroom when we moved houses, and now it's mine.
I'm not sure that I know the story of who’s on it. I mean, I'm sure that (it's) some prophet or something from the Bible or something, but our family actually isn't very religious.
I went to church when I was little. As a Christian, but my mom was raised Catholic and went to Catholic school and were Hispanic, Cuban. But I think for her, just because it had angels on it, it was something special. I think they were just definitely more religious when I was a baby and wanting me to be watched over.
So the house that we grew up in until we were like nine, that's when it was in my sister's room. From the age of ten to 18 is when it was in my mom's room. And my sisters graduated high school two years after me.
“I feel like I'm away from home a lot so for me, it just reminds me of like growing up and the safety of my mom and her bedroom.”
We lived in actually this like big it's the oldest house in Orlando. It's from 1884. There's an elevator! it's like this old style Victorian house, but it was too much for my mom to do by herself because, my mum and dad, they got divorced when I was like 13. So it was just after my sisters moved out for college, when she was packing up stuff, she was just getting rid of like everything.
And I took most of it.
And this was one of the things, because I took a bunch of stuff from her room to decorate my own new apartment when I moved out of the dorms - and also just, you know, to have stuff that reminds me of my family.
Most of my stuff in my apartment is from my family, my grandparents.
So I don't have a ceiling fan, which is like a normal thing for New York, honestly.
It was kind of disappointing when I brought it back because I'm like, ‘I have no idea what to hang it on.’
So I'm sure, one day, when I have a family and a house, I'll have a ceiling fan somewhere - if I don't live in New York or I'm like in the suburbs.
For now, it's just in my bedside table because I would imagine it would be in my room if it can be. So, that's where I keep it.
I feel like I'm away from home a lot so for me, it just reminds me of like growing up and the safety of my mom and her bedroom.
Especially when my parents got divorced because she was alone in there. So I would spend a lot of time with her - whenever I'd have a nightmare, I couldn't sleep, I'd sleep in her bed. She would rub my back till I fall asleep. We cuddle with all the dogs.
“I'm sure, maybe when I have a kid, I can put it over their nursery - you know, that’d be really cute.”
So I guess for me, it's just like an emotional attachment sort of thing - that I have to a lot of inanimate objects, honestly.
But this is one of the important ones that stood out to me.
The meaning of it definitely has changed. Even yesterday, before I asked my mom - because I didn't know that it was in my childhood and that it was bought for me. I assumed it was always in my mom's room, because I didn't remember that far back, and I didn't notice it until we moved houses, even though I grew up with it.
It definitely has grown more significant, especially knowing more of a backstory for it, because I had my own story for it. It turns out my mom had a story, too.
I'm sure, maybe when I have a kid, I can put it over their nursery - you know, that’d be really cute.
Jesse
So have you spoken to your sister? You mentioned it went to your sister's room for a little bit.
Cecilia
No, I haven't. I that's a good idea, though. My sisters, they're twins. They were like shoved into a small room. I had the big room - I don't know why because there's two of them.
I should ask them, though. I'll do that today because I don't know if they'll remember it, but I'm sure they did.
I feel like there's a lot of stuff I would miss. Like, yesterday, especially, I was looking for some stuff. Even my grandpa's ring - that was his dad's. And because I move, like, every year - because, you know, living in New York and rent prices - there is some stuff that I've… not lost. I don't say I've lost them but I say I've misplaced them and that they'll turn up eventually because they're in my apartment somewhere.
I feel like this is something I wouldn't have noticed going missing before - because I just have so much stuff and junk.
But yeah, now I definitely would miss it.
And I don't know, it'd be kind of like disappointing. But I'd probably find something else or place some importance on something else.
Follow Cecilia’s photography work on Instagram: @cecilia.kegler
